I have autism and ADHD, and working at Hudl has become increasingly difficult. The only feedback we’re getting lately is negative, which has made it hard to trust my abilities and has led to significant anxiety. In previous jobs, I had clear expectations and received specific, balanced feedback that helped me grow, but here, despite asking for clarity, I haven’t been able to get that. It's been difficult to understand what I need to do without this accommodation.
The lack of strong mentorship and consistent training for new managers has been especially challenging. I feel that my work is not being evaluated fairly, especially since I'm introverted and struggle with social cues. I worry that I’m being rated lower now, even if my work is still good. This has taken a toll on my mental health, and I've even returned to therapy. My therapist believes I should leave, but with the job market being tough, I’m unsure.
Additionally, I’m struggling to prioritize my work. Our product manager frequently changes priorities without explaining the business reasoning behind them, so it’s unclear why we’re working on certain tasks or whether they are even impacting our customers. This lack of clarity makes it difficult to focus and feel confident in the work I’m doing.
I’m thankful to still have a job, but seeing many neurodivergent colleagues let go or leave recently has left me constantly anxious about being fired. One of my friends requested clear steps for improvement based on performance feedback and was let go shortly after, which only increases my worry. I don’t know how much longer I can stay in this environment.
